JUAN'S STORY

by Breeanna Greska

Juan pulled his sweater tighter around him as the chilly wind prickled his skin. It was his idea of a perfect fall day. The leaves, crisp and colorful, swirled through the trees, and the sun made just a slight appearance, making up for the brisk cold. As he walked, he wondered what Angela had to say that was so important she couldn't tell him in school.

"Meet me by the tree at 5!" she had told him briefly, before running off to drama club, a yearbook meeting, or student council. She was always at one of the three, he could just never remember which.

Passing Old Lady Heaver's house reminded him of the time he and Angela had hid in his bushes during Halloween. Legend had it that Old Lady Heaver was really a witch. No one knew for sure, but she never stepped foot out of her house. Juan had always wondered how she got by. How did she eat without going to the grocery store? How did she take care of herself? The more he thought about it, he realized he'd rather not know.

On Halloween, Juan and Angela decided to go trick-or treating. That was one of the things he loved about her, her willingness to do anything, and her inner child that she often brought out. They had been walking along, minding their own business when some black-clad punks just ran out of nowhere and began hurling eggs at them. Juan had been flustered and a bit embarrassed, and didn't really know what to do. Here he was, a 17 year old junior, not even tough enough to fight back some fourteen year old dorks with nothing better to do. But Angela, wonderful Angela, had just giggled and grabbed his hand, pulling him right into Heaver's yard.

Juan remembered the way his heart had pounded, and he remembered worrying about Angela thinking his hands were too clammy, or sweaty. Angela just sat there, whispering Heaver jokes and legends into Juan's ear, making him laugh. He also remembered when he caught a flash of white hair in the window, and saw the doorknob turn, that he and Angela bolted up, sprinting from their place in the bushes, and ran like horses racing. He smiled as he finished the thought, sliding his hands deeper into his soft pockets, the endless pockets that Angela teased him about.

"Anything could come out of those pockets, Juan", she would grin at him, "I bet I could find my grandmother in there!"

Juan laughed, thinking about his habit of placing everything-from gum and keys to his wallet and pens to his cell phone and ipod, in those never-ending pockets. As Juan carefully sidestepped a crack on the sidewalk (another one of Angela's silly games), he thought about Angela, in general. He thought about how when she would smile, her eyes would crinkle up, and her dimples would form crevices, and the white of her teeth was blinding. Her eyes, blue and large as Atlantic Ocean, were always smiling.

Suddenly, a thought struck him. He would tell her! He would tell Angela that she meant more to him, was more real to him than anything he'd ever known! He would tell her how long he's loved her, how she was the first thing he thought of when he woke up, and the last when he went to sleep. Sure, Angela knew he loved her, they had been dating for six months, six blissful months. But maybe he should let her know how he really felt...everything he loved about her. The way her hair smelled, and the way it slid, cool and silky, between his fingers, the softness of her creamy skin, and the way their bodies fit so perfectly together when he held her. He wanted to tell her that they were meant for each other...that they should always be together. He affirmed this idea as he rounded the corner, only a block away from the tree, but not just any tree-their tree. He and Angela had shared their first kiss at this tree. In fact, it had been on a cool fall day, just like this one, last year.

They hadn't been going out yet, and Juan was still nervous around her. He remembered putting his arm around her shoulders tentatively, and how her delicate fingers had curled around his. He had been shaking when he bent down, squeezing his eyes shut tight, as he leaned down to meet her face. Her lips had been so soft, and had sent such a shock through him, that it rippled all the way through his body and back again before he was revived. Her chestnut hair had fallen over his shoulders as she lazily leaned her head back, smiling up at him. She had then gotten up and chased him around, encouraging him to be young again, to fall in the leaves, and push her on the swings.

Oh, Angela, what a character you are, Juan thought affectionately, only steps away from the tree. This was the woman he was going to spend his life with. His eyes lit up when he saw her, swaying from side to side with her eyes closed. She was singing in her head, like she always did. When he reached her, he held his arms out to embrace her, but she ducked. "Juan", she began shakily..."I...".

"Whats wrong, babe?" he asked, moving to hug her again.

"I wanna tell you something Ang, I wanna tell you something big!" He grinned at her, reaching his hand out to brush her cheek.

"Juan!" Angela said, sharply this time.

"Chill out, Angie, what's up?" Angela sighed, and stood gnawing on her fingernail, her eyes fixed on her shoes.

"I'm sorry Juan...but...I'm not so sure if I have time for you anymore. I mean, I'm so busy with drama club, and student council...and I really need to bring that math grade up." Juan, looking confused, tried to hug her again, and said

"It's okay, Ang, I know, but, you have to have time for me...you always do...you're just stressed, you'll be fi-"

"No, Juan", Angela cut him off, "I mean it. It's not just that I don't have time. I also kind of realized that..I'm too young to be tied down...I kind of want to date more...and have the freedom to see other people.

" Juan's eyes filled with hurt, and his face crumpled in disbelief.

"Ang...", he whispered,

"Angie, baby, please...don't say that." Angela rubbed her eyes, blinking several times.

"I'm sorry Juan...", she said softly, "It's just gonna work." She turned around and began to stride away, never looking back. Juan stared after her, until the familiar blue sweater and black high-tops became a blur. He sat down, holding his head in his hand, rocking back and forth, trying desperately to hold his tears in. He just didn't understand. How could she do this? Juan stayed there through the night, barely feeling the cold whipping his cheeks, and the leaves tangled in his hair. It had been a fall day, his perfect idea of a fall day.